


THE STORE: BY MAE MAE; SCRIPT

by dontdosadness



Category: The Store: A Musical by Mae Mae
Genre: F/F, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-08 00:49:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16419275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontdosadness/pseuds/dontdosadness
Summary: Christine is a young woman who works at Mallmart with her gay friends, Lucas and Daniel, and her sister, Gerardaline. One day, a girl named Stella comes for a job there.





	THE STORE: BY MAE MAE; SCRIPT

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank my sister, who is there for me all the time. I would like to thank any of you who are reading this.

The Store  
\--------------------------------------------  
DANIEL  
Are you stuck at your job?  
LUCAS  
Are you dying inside?  
GERARDALINE  
Would you rather stab yourself then clean?  
CHRISTINE  
Do you know you know how much this store sucks?  
COMPANY  
Because employees are and employees do.  
Employees are and employees do.  
Employees are and employees do.  
DANIEL  
Are you cringing hard?  
LUCAS  
Are you living in your breakroom?  
GERARDALINE  
Are you thinking about hiding in the freezer?  
CHRISTINE  
Are you worried glitter is stuck in the food cans?  
DANIEL  
Lucas!  
LUCAS  
Sorry  
COMPANY  
Employees are the thing keeping the economy together!  
Cleaning it up and restocking aisles!  
Woah  
(Stella throws Pallet on the stage)  
GERARDALINE  
What the fuck? Come back you little-  
CHRISTINE  
Gee! Stop!  
GERARDALINE  
Sorry.  
COMPANY  
Crappy Songs For Crappy Employees!  
Crappy Songs For Crappy Employees!  
Crappy Songs For Crappy Employees!  
\--------------------------------------------  
CHRISTINE  
Okay,Dan. Just don't get pregnant.  
DANIEL  
Yes,Chris.  
*Christine walks away*  
DANIEL  
Pallet Boy,I love you!  
Oh oh,it's true!  
You had no clue,that I love you.  
Pallet boy,oh woah oh  
LUCAS  
Daniel? Why are you climbing on top of me and this pallet?  
DANIEL  
Ssshh.  
LUCAS  
Just let me show you my love...  
DANIEL  
On aisle 13?  
LUCAS  
Oh,yes.  
DANIEL  
Sure what the hell.  
DANIEL kisses LUCAS  
COMPANY  
oh woah oh let me show you  
woah woah waoh waoh woah oh  
(Company pushes them and the Pallets away)  
\--------------------------------------------  
CHRISTINE  
Get out of the cart 200 pound shopping cart boy  
You break my heart you all alone in your cart  
oh oh ohhh  
You block the burritos while you eat all your Cheetos!  
No tacos in my mouth  
I hope you realize,just how you are feeling!  
Get out of the cart!  
No tacos in my mouth  
\--------------------------------------------  
COMPANY  
Get out of the cart 200 pound shopping cart boy  
You break my heart you all alone in your cart  
oh oh ohhh  
CHRISTINE  
Get out of the cart 200 pound shopping cart boy  
STELLA AND GERARDALINE  
Get out of the cart  
COMPANY  
No tacos in my mouth  
DANIEL  
I hope you realize,just how you are feeling.  
COMPANY  
feeling  
COMPANY  
No tacos in my mouth  
\--------------------------------------------  
LUCAS  
*finds bear in aisle that is inappropriately laid*  
*moaning*  
Oh,Daniel,paint me like one of your French bears!  
STELLA  
That's gross! Who did that!  
DANIEL  
I can see a few punks who may have done that....  
(STELLA,LUCAS AND DANIEL look over to see 3 boys on scooters with spray paint.)  
GERARDALINE  
Shit! Those are my friends!  
*looks behind the bear*  
Look! Someone painted a dick!  
COMPANY  
eww!  
LUCAS  
Ooh!  
DANIEL  
Sorry. He's too gay.  
LUCAS  
It's true. But so are you!  
DANIEL  
No! I'm pan!  
LUCAS  
Kiss me Pan Man!  
*LUCAS kisses DANIEL and the two begin sexing*  
GERARDALINE  
What happened on aisle thirteen?  
What happened? What Happened?  
What happened on aisle thirteen?  
It's amazing just to see  
What happened on aisle thirteen.  
STELLA  
Gee,what's that?  
LUCAS  
*yelling*  
It's a penis!  
DANIEL  
Why look at the fake one?  
*LUCAS pushes DANIEL off him*  
LUCAS  
Daniel!  
DANIEL  
Sorry.  
*LUCAS pulls DANIEL into his lap*  
STELLA  
What's a penis  
LUCAS  
well...  
GERARDALINE  
*screams*  
STOP! WE CANT RUIN HER DISGUSTING PURENESS!  
LUCAS  
Sorry.  
GERARDALINE  
What happened on aisle thirteen?  
COMPANY  
What happened? What Happened?  
What happened on aisle thirteen?  
It's amazing just to see  
What happened on aisle thirteen.  
STELLA and GERARDALINE  
What happened on aisle thirteen?  
CHRISTINE  
*walks in*  
Seriously,what the fuck happened?  
STELLA AND GERARDALINE  
On Aisle Thirteen!  
\--------------------------------------------  
(The OFFICE flies in,CHRISTINE is sitting on the windowsill and looking at the cameras)  
CHRISTINE  
Oh my fucking God. Look at this!  
STELLA  
It's hilarious!  
GERARDALINE  
Ha ha ha.  
DANIEL  
Why not change before going to the store?  
LUCAS  
Oh my gosh! They are wearing smiley face pants and walking stereotypically like only a character in a horribly written musical would do!  
CHRISTINE  
Pajama Pants Man! Pajama Pants Man.  
Couldn't bother to change his clothes.  
STELLA  
Now everyone knows!  
He probably has no money and isn't very funny.  
Pajama Pants Man!  
COMPANY  
Pajama Pants Man!  
CHRISTINE  
Couldn't bother to change his clothes.  
STELLA  
Now everyone knows!  
CHRISTINE AND STELLA  
Woah woah woah  
It's a pajama Pants Man!  
Whom we all stan!  
Oh woah!  
Pajama Pants Man!  
\--------------------------------------------  
(LUCAS,DANIEL and CHRISTINE walk outside to the parking lot where STELLA is screaming)  
STELLA  
Aaaaaaaaaaaah!  
*STELLA is on top of LUCAS and DANIELS car*  
DANIEL  
Get the fuck off of my car asswipe!  
STELLA  
You're mean.  
*LUCAS goes to hug DANIEL*  
LUCAS  
Are those rats? Run faster,boy! Don't be a quitter little critter!  
LUCAS/DANIEL  
Run faster little boy! Don't be a quitter critter.  
*STELLA jumps onto CHRISTINE*  
CHRISTINE  
Come here little critter!  
Become a quitter!  
Slow down!  
Don't be such a clown!  
Woah,woah  
LUCAS/DANIEL/STELLA  
Go away critter!  
Become a quitter!  
Don't be a clown!  
Slow down!  
Don't be a quitter!  
Little Critter!  
CHRISTINE  
*grabs knife*  
I got em!  
*they all walk back inside*  
\--------------------------------------------  
*GERARDALINE and STELLA walk inside the beer aisle to restock*  
GERARDALINE  
So Stella,you're 21 right?  
STELLA  
Yes!  
Gee! Look! It's my name!  
GERARDALINE  
Kinky?  
STELLA  
No. The one next to it!  
It's like some type of fruit juice!  
GERARDALINE  
Um.. Sure. Would you like one Stella?  
STELLA  
Sure thanks friend!  
GERARDALINE  
It was not fruit juice  
*LUCAS is pushing DANIEL around in a shopping cart and screaming*  
GERARDALINE  
Haven't You people ever heard of calming the fuck down?!  
STELLA  
*begins screaming pop lyrics*  
ITS LIKE IM FLYING AWAY ON A CLOUD TO SOME FARAWAY LAND THAT IS TOO FAR FOR ME TO WALK THERE WHILE I RETHINK MY LIFE AND MUNCH ON SOME GRANOLA BARS AND FLY AWAY TO SPACE WOHO  
*walks away*  
STELLA  
Wooooooooooooooooooooo  
ooooooooooopppppppppppp  
\--------------------------------------------  
CHRISTINE  
*walks over to STELLA who is restocking aisles*  
Pallet girl ,I love you!  
Oh oh,it's true!  
You had no clue,that I love you.  
Pallet girl,oh woah oh  
STELLA  
Christine? Why are you on top of me?  
CHRISTINE  
Ssshh.  
CHRISTINE  
Just let me show you my love...  
STELLA  
On aisle 13? This aisle?  
CHRISTINE  
Oh,yes.  
STELLA  
Sure,best friend!  
STELLA kisses CHRISTINE  
COMPANY  
oh woah oh let me show you  
woah woah waoh waoh woah oh  
(Company pushes them and the Pallets away just when things begin to get interesting)  
GERARDALINE  
*crawls out from a shelf*  
I gotta fricking tape off this aisle so they stop making out on top of the products. At least next time Chris should tell me so I can hide some bleach here.  
\--------------------------------------------  
{Scene Change}  
DANIEL  
It's the gay icons of this!  
LUCAS  
Yay!  
(truck drives over)  
LUCAS  
Aaaaaaaaaaaa  
(Lucas dies)'  
GERARDALINE  
This is a musical,of course one of the gay boys had to die.  
{Musical Ends}


End file.
